Today I begin a new sort of story. One, where I talk about my experience in the internship program here at B.C.E. The vision here at B.C.E is also fueled by people like me deciding to take some time out of my life and be committed for a year of service here at B.C.E. I’m sure I’ll write a story on just the history and topic of the internship program at some point, but today I began telling you a little about the lesson God has been teaching me lately through this program. I hope there might be something that sticks with you as read about the misadventures of a not so young intern.
The title? Yes! The Title. I think we all felt overwhelmed as life keeps letting speeding trains loose on our way. One thing, then the next. Last year was the pinnacle of it all right? I think we have all exhausted our complaints about 2020 but still, it was BAD right? Some of us left rushing to find purpose, rushing to accomplish what we can, some with a sense of urgency, some with an air of defeat. What if it was all a fair game, maybe we were all in the ‘same boat’ after all, and left with only our own resolve -and hopefully, God-, to mull through a not-so-great year. And where I want to take is this, when catastrophe stricks what do we think of? “Ourselves” more than likely and maybe how little we’ve done. I know I felt that way, and Iot of people I talked to felt the same way. The nagging critical voice of our own self-awareness sneers at us, ‘hey you haven’t done that one thing you said you were going to do!’
So, if you are at a point in your life that you trapped between the conundrum not knowing what to do or when to do it, then you can relate. In my life, I can’t say that I have always had a sense of urgency whenever I’m doing things. I have always taken things seriously, such as deadlines or when there is an absolute need. And I feel I was left in the dust, as life sped past me and I failed to counteract it with a sense of urgency in getting things done. I always wanted to start writing again. I had always wanted to get my driver’s license. I had always wanted to learn to cook at least one thing to boast to my Mom and say hey I can make this thing too! To take some time to visit an orphanage. Get my life in order and start waking up early. Also, start serving God full time- whatever that looks like.
Maybe some of the things I just mentioned resounds or maybe you have your own to-do list. And guess what? During the past week or so, or rather from the start of my internship I have made progress in all of the things I mentioned before and even more. And as I gripped the steering wheel of Rambo way too tight, (the famous green truck at base), with a little smirk ‘I said to myself I can’t believe I’m doing this. I was nervous but suddenly more confident about myself. Maybe this might sound like all mundane or trivial things to you, but to a person who was lost so often in their own chaotic world, this is a lot. I often think a person who has accomplished a lot stares off into the horizon and thinks there’s so much ground left to cover. I need to run that good race. What is left to do, Lord?
I think to myself, “I’ve made good progress”. But I am also aware of how easily we can let go of the good that we are working towards. In a second we stop and look down below and get scared of the high we’ve climbed. Or perhaps discouraged by how little we have moved. Maybe your challenge isn’t a silly little thing like learning how to drive. It might be serving God full-time in your life, and that’s a little scarier. It might also be indecisiveness, not knowing what to do next or how to do it. You might be stuck in deciding whether to give of your time and resources. And my advice to you is to do it with a sense of urgency. Like the world is waiting for you to wake one day and yell into the morning sun, “Today is the day”. These past months have been teaching me this. And how wasteful would it be for me to suddenly lose this drive and momentum I’ve been building through the internship program and become indifferent to life’s many hurdles. More challenges will inevitably come, but I will face them now with a renewed sense of urgency. What about you? Can you say the same?